Okay, everyone!  You can watch our wedding LIVE, yes LIVE, today at 12:30 pm EST.  So, make sure you check here and watch if you are not able to come onsite today! 

We are so excited to share our incredible moment with you!

GO HERE to watch LIVE.

I know it has been FOREVER since I have blogged.  Did ya miss me?      It’s been a little hectic in Andiraland because the job I had got really busy and then there is this wonderful event coming up in 3 weeks….

3 WEEKS!!!!!   

Am I spastic?  I gotta be honest.    Only slightly.   Suddenly I don’t have a job again.  If you want the details, just ask.  It was a sad day last Friday.  I loved that job…but sometimes companies buy other companies and some people have to be let go….

Anyhow, I have some free time on my hands.  There is much to do, but I think God has given us the time to get it done.  He always provides, even when we don’t understand the ways.   This new chapter in my life is so exciting.  I cannot express to you how grateful I am that God would have led me here.   Certainly, I made some choices that brought me around to this point, but how much God has protected me and strengthened me over the years.  Never could I have imagined this expression of love…this great gift I have been given.  How much I longed to have someone to share life with!  Yet in 3 weeks and one day I will be Mrs.  Andria Vernon. 

WOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

James is so incredibly caring and selfless.  He consistently and regularly reminds me of his love for me.  He makes me laugh and cry (in a good way), and holds my hand when I’m scared.  My heart overflows.  My CUP overflows.  I’m so overjoyed to become his wife.

So I know I may get yelled at some because I’m sharing secrets with you, but I’m anxious.  You won’t see EVERY special thing, but here’s a preview of our special day.  We are so stoked to celebrate our new marriage with you!

1)  Special music by Desiree Lulay, Tim Welborn, and the Bethany trio accompanied by my sisnlaw Tara Reich, brother Jordan, and the amazing Maribeth Jennings.

2) Lace and feathers!

3)

4) Boutineers

5)

Bridesmaids dress

6) Yes, there will be cake!

7)

And that is all you’re getting until the wedding! 

So until then, please pray that God will provide a great job for me and that God will bless James and my marriage abundantly.  

Much love,

Andria

Found this today while going through old files:

God, you are the joy of my life.

I cannot fathom peace apart from You.

The moment I cry out for You,

You are there to soothe my shout.

I praise you; you are worthy!

My faith falters when the earth shakes beneath me,

but You steady my feet and restore my heart.

God, I desire to honor you with my life.

I have failed You and followed unholy roads

but You save me in grace; you save me in love.

I praise you; you are worthy!

You reach beyond human understanding,

You realign my focus and give me purpose.

God, you beckon us to know you.

Your goodness covers the earth with hope.

We are lost apart from You.

Our hearts ache alone.

I praise you; you are worthy!

You create in passion, you pave a faithful way.

You do not withhold your efforts

to bring us home to you.

I praise you, I praise you, you are so worthy!

I know it’s been a long time since I have posted, but I have a very good reason.   The last few months of my life have been very full.  I have a new job, that I am so thankful for.  I love it.  And most important, I am getting married. 

Yep, that’s right! 

On November 7, 2009 I will become Mrs. James Vernon.  And I am blessed beyond measure.  James and I met through an event I organize called the Union Cross Cafe.  Last fall I called his mom to get his phone number (her brother goes to my church) so I could book his band, Caricature, to play at Christmas.  Little did I know that a year later we’d be getting married. 

It was uncanny how much we had in common.  How much in-line our attitudes about life and God and people were.  We were in the same places in life, unemployed and waiting for God to provide a life-mate as well as a job.  We spent hours talking late on facebook about everything.  After about a month of hanging out about every day, we had our official ”first date.”   Good thing IHOP is open all night.  We sat there for about 4 hours talking.  Almost without any beats.

And after counsel and prayers from our families, mentors and friends, it seems unanimous that God has provided us for each other.  We are so excited about starting our lives together.

A decision that we made early on in our dating relationship was regarding where we would attend church.  You see, we both have been highly involved in ministries at each of our churches.  He has gone to New Hope Baptist all of his life, and a good bulk of my life has been spent at Christ Wesleyan Church.  James prayed about it, and I prayed about it.  I had felt God preparing for the last year that I would need to move on from CWC, though.  And James believes that New Hope is the church where we need to be unless God moves us elsewhere.  So I have very recently joined New Hope Baptist, and we will share ministries there. 

I’m very excited! Leaving CWC is a bit melancholy because I will  VERY much miss all of the CWC family.  I have grown so much in my walk with God at CWC.  The opportunities I have had there have been tremendous.  I’ve made amazing friends and have extended family there.  My CWC family will always be in my life..in my heart.  You all have been such a blessing.   But God always provides, and I know that there is a special place for me at New Hope with James.  Already there are opportunities there, and I have made some friends.  It’s going to be a great journey.

I will appreciate prayers for James and I as we prepare for our wedding and our life together.

My dad wrote me an encouraging letter and handed it to me today. Sometimes my dad writes me letters…I needed the words that my father penned today.

God always provides.

Sometimes I really don’t appreciate God’s provision as much as I should.  I have misinterpreted it in the past…and overlooked it.   Yesterday I had the opportunity to stand in a park and soak in a love song from God.  As I meandered in the grass, His promises poured into the empty spaces of my heart.

And then it occurred to me that my panic had disappeared.  Since my initial panic attack on November 14th last year, I have struggled daily with panic…stress-induced asthma.  It has crippled my singing (which is partly why I’ve been taking break from giving concerts).  Such a nuisance it has been, and I have been working through it all these months with prayer and petition and “stress-relief”.   And then all of the sudden, the panic was gone.  Completely.  Two days ago.

And I only realized it yesterday at the park, with tears streaming down my face.

On top of that, yesterday morning I woke up without a dream in my head.  The same this morning.  Praise God!!!!!!!!  I cannot even begin to explain to you how much of a relief this is!  I know it has only been two days, and I do not know what triggered the release.   I’m just so thankful!  These two days are the first days since November that I’ve woken up without a nightmare/dream.  Wow.

God provides in ways we may not always expect or in the timing we hope for, but His way is always SOOOO  much better than anything I could have ever anticipated.  I am trusting Him for a job…for my future.  It is such a joy to honor Him with my everyday.

Can I take a moment to be really vulnerable and honest? I may regret this tomorrow….

I feel like I don’t belong anywhere.   It’s really starting to bother me.  Almost all my friends that are around my age are married and most have kids or are planning kids.  They are kinda bound by their families…can’t run off on the fly.  And I feel stupid around them…like, I seriously can’t relate at all.  I still feel 21.  I feel like everyone around my age are a generation ahead of me.

The rest of my friends are much younger than me…and I’m pretty sure they are uber-supportive, but they have no way of truly empathizing.  They haven’t lived long enough.  And usually they just make a joke out of my situation, for which I laugh along.  But honestly, it hurts.  Deeply.

So, I’m really lonely.  Feeling guilty for not being content…b/c I’m truly blessed beyond measure.  But this is so confusing.  And my biggest fear is that this is all there is, this great big circle and the haunting of my past relationships….that I will be forever fighting off this feeling of inadequacy, of not being good enough.  I don’t understand why all the men in my life have loved me, yet preferred well….something that will never fulfill their need.  Not that I ever could, for that I always knew.  But to be told you are loved more than his own life, while at the same time told it’s not your fault that it can never be….UGH!   How could that NOT make you feel worthless?  I don’t care WHAT the situation is.

And after years and years of prayer and petition and giving everything up to God, I think I’m going insane.  I FEEL like I’m going insane.  God would not torture me this way–I know this is a continual attack on my spirit from the devil…but I’m seriously sick of having to push it off.  And I don’t know what else to do other than what I’ve been doing living for Jesus.

I’m just praying God hasn’t forgotten me. He knows my heart, my longings, this terrible loneliness.  I just hope He has something for me that will make all this heartache worth it…or at least make it leave forever.  God, please don’t forget me.

Today I woke up to another nightmare.  For months now I’ve been waking up in the middle of horrific dreams, and I feel like I never sleep.  The dreams are stressful…so much so that when I wake up I cannot breathe, and my arms and legs are in pain from the tension. So I allowed myself a real day of rest on this Sunday and am spending the morning at home with my Abba.

Last night at the Union Cross Cafe, I was blown away by the music.  I am so proud of my brother and his band…and my dear friend Tara Jackson.  I really hope that the music and fellowship was as uplifting to everyone else there as it was to me.  It is so good to gather together and celebrate our Saviour.

Tara said something last night..about the world having a spirit of discouragment right now…do you sense it too?  The war between our Creator and the Enemy seems to be heightened right now.  Between heartache and financial stress, it almost seems like God’s children are being attacked.  They probably are.  Someone said in young adults a couple weeks ago that Satan is trying to suck out all the hope in the world, and how appropriate that he would target the people that know of the only true Hope.  Not that they are the only ones targeted, by any means.  But the numbers in my church out of work and hurting are staggering.

They probably are in yours too.

I myself am fighting discouragment.  A day hasn’t gone by lately where I haven’t been tempted to give up (especially on myself).   I have been tempted to dwell on superficial things…things that will not matter in the course of  my life.  Seems like the devil likes to make us feel worthless often.  Sure does break one’s spirit.  So it’s good to remember that my worth is in Christ…not in the world or how the world views me. I have purpose in and because of Him.

So, thought I’d make a list of who Jesus is to me.  Jesus is:

• my comforter
• alive!
• forgiveness
• my best friend
• the one who gave me a reason to really live
• my sustainer
• grace, breathtaking  grace
• the one who fights for me
• tenderhearted
• my cheerleader
• the way, the truth and the life…the ONLY way to have a forever with our Creator
• my hero
• so loving
• compassion, gut-wrenching full of compassion
• my shield
• my joy
• the one who took my place of death and shame … the one who got what I deserved
• the one who thought I was worth dying for
• my hope

And even though we do not know what tomorrow brings, the victory is already His!  “Today has enough worry for itself.”  I know that tomorrow is God’s.  I know that God loved us so much that He sacrificed His son..His own flesh…so that we’d have eternity with Him.

This is a love like I have never known.

Hallelujah!

My buddy Scott Johnson took part in the AMTC (Actors, models and talent competition), and this is the video of his performance.
Last fall, he and his band performed at the October Union Cross Cafe…they were great!

Catch more of them at his myspace page!

My church, Christ Wesleyan Church, is starting something this week.  Tuesday mornings at 9 am, the Hospitality Room will be open for an Unemployment Support Group.  We will start off with prayer….so necessary as we need to come before our Father and give Him everything.  So many of us are in need.  So many are hurting financially with the economy the way it is.  But, God is bigger!

After prayer, breakfast will be provided.  We will have free wireless internet provided for your laptops, information on unemployment and networking, as well as websites to frequent in efforts to acquire employment.

Overall, this will be an informal group.  It is difficult to get and remain motivated everyday to go through the repetitious application processes.  We hope that this will be be a motivation and encouragement.  If you are unemployed, you know you are not alone!  And, CWC wants to help.

Tuesday mornings at 9 am…bring your laptop….bring your ideas….come as you are! We will get through this together with the Lord by our side!