Not fine as in alright, lookin’ good, okay…fine as in the italian word for finished!!!! Why? Because as of October 12th, 2007, my 9 song demo EP is fine! Praise be to the God of my story, the God of my heart. It’s been a long year, but a fruitful one.
I’ve learned more about myself and about how to accept myself this year than I ever thought possible. That sounds very selfish. I don’t really go for that term “find yourself”, but I definitly found myself this year…right in the arms of Jesus. I tell you, it is so, so easy to have the knowledge that Jesus should be your all in all. Living it it is easier. Did you think I would say it was harder? Honestly, it makes life so much easier. It is easier to breathe, easier to relate, easier to let go, easier to move…and I could go on. Learning how was the difficult part, I suppose.
I love the air up here.
The mountains have always been my solace. I’ve always headed there when in need of refreshment or clarity. But God allowed me to realize this year that my circumstances and my location are unimportant. They cannot save me. They cannot protect me. They cannot hold me back. They cannot determine my attitude. I used to go to the mountains b/c it is quieter there. It is easier to put everything else aside there.
But what God wants for me and for all of us is to trust Him. No other gods before Him. My mom said it so well tonight. Anything could become a god. School. A relationship. A career. Even church ministry. We need to listen, to converse with the God of our stories regularly. He is for us, not against us.
So today I don’t require the mountains in order to gain clarity or refreshment. I must choose to put everything else aside for time with my Salvation. There is everything I need, all I need to rely upon. While the world falls aways and the opinions drip steadily, His word and promise I can stand upon without fear.
I hope to head to the mountains soon. And instead of going for renewal, I will go already renewed and rejoice that God has saved me, that God has given me the freedom and ability to trust Him with my story. And boy, am I trusting Him with that. 🙂 Without Him, it means nothing.