“I’ll never be the same.”  We sang these words this morning during our church service.  It is always uplifting to be reminded of what Jesus did for us and that God made a way for us to be with Him.  We need these reminders and to be encouraged that God is for us, and that He has been with us all this time.

I have faced a lot of  uncertainty in my time on this earth.  Being in limbo is a feeling I am very familiar with.  My heartaches have cut deeply, but the scars that remain remind me that I survived the storm, God walked me through it all, and now I have an incredible story of hope to share with others.  I want my legacy to be one that points to the power of Yahweh. Though this has been my heart’s desire ever since I was a teenager, I never would have imagined the struggles to come.

Our pastor Mark Norris’s message this morning was incredible.   He was speaking to us about the transformation that occurs as a disciple of Christ, and he used the example of a butterfly so beautifully.   The butterfly will not grow to its fullness without the struggle that occurs within its cocoon.  A complete change is not a quick process, and it is also not an easy one.   Whew, I can attest to this.

A few years ago, I was dealing with some deep depression and some heartaches that I never thought would heal.  If you have read some of my other blogs, you know about this.  Depression is serious, and it can really debilitate a person…and it put me in a terrible mindset as well as life-threatening position.  Pastor Mark this morning said it so true this morning….it starts in the mind.  That is where Satan hangs out.  We need a renewal of our minds on a daily basis. It is our minds that get attacked, so this is where we need to suit up.   We need truth.   We need the Word of God- powerful, life-changing, Spirit-revealed scripture.  It was a tough process to filter through all of the lies I had believed while I was in the dark deep of discouragement.  However, God’s Word pierced through that darkness and reminded me of His faithfulness.  Hallelujah!

After coming out of that darkness in 2006, I noticed a significant change in my mind.   I never wanted to forget what God had done for me….I knew I would never be the same.  So I got my first tattoo….a simple butterfly on my ankle….a reminder of the struggle and transformation.

I am grateful that our pasts are behind us.  I am glad that we can continue to move forward towards the promise of Jesus’ return.   I am sure there are plenty of difficult days ahead, but I know who holds my heart and mind, and I am holding onto that Hand of Providence with all my might!!!!  Our histories may vary, and many of us would maybe prefer to never even think of them again.  I completely understand.  Some of you probably think reflecting on the past is just boring, a waste of time, or dangerous.   It is all about perspective, friends!   Our histories are stories of His faithfulness.  Whether the accounts are recent or from Biblical times, reflecting on God’s goodness is ALWAYS a good thing.  When we reflect on these, we are building strength of our minds and hearts to prepare for tough times.   May we never lose the wonder and awe of God’s provision.

I will end with the lyrics from another song called “Fullness” that we sang this morning:

“Fullness of eternal promise

Stirring in your sons and daughters

Earth revealing heaven’s wonders

Spirit come

Now the world awaits Your presence

And this power is within us

We will rise to be Your witness

Spirit come”

The Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness.   I am grateful, and I testify to this truth!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s