This morning as I talked with God, I was thinking about Levi. When he was younger and I would ask him to do something, he would pretty much jump to the task. It was not usually done perfectly, but he attempted it. Now, though, Levi often ignores me or answers “OK” in a pretty frustrated tone. He will continue to procrastinate and do other things that he wants to do. I do not always respond to these situations well, so this morning, I asked the Lord to help me be more patient with my son.
This reminded me how patient Yahweh is with us. Throughout time, He has made efforts to bring His children closer to Him and help lead them in directions that were for THEIR best. However, so many times we just do our own thing. The Israelites did their own thing and wound up circling the desert for 40 years. Jonah did his own thing and found himself in the belly of a big fish. David did his own thing and ended up murdering someone out of fear. Sometimes I think we are just plain scared. Although many times we are selfish in our disobedience, it seems like much of it is rooted in fear. It all comes down to trusting God with all of our hearts.
As Levi has gotten older, he has gotten more confident and capable. He does not have to rely on me for everything. He has begun to plan his own time, and he makes more and more decisions by himself….what to wear, what he likes to eat, what he wants to build, how he wants to play. He still needs me, but sometimes it seems like he pretends I am not around. When I step in and remind him of what he should be doing, he gets irritated. When I ask him to do something new that is challenging, he gets a little scared. When he trusts me and obeys, he often realizes it was for a good reason. He cannot always see the big picture like I can. He does not always remember that cleaning up throughout the day helps our evenings be more easy and peaceful.
Maybe the task is something that is overwhelming. Perhaps we do not see the good it will do us. It could be that we are scared of the steps….or of the outcome. Sometimes we doubt that it will make a difference. However, the older I get, the more I realize….God has a good reason for everything he asks us to do/not do. He always ALWAYS has our best interest at heart. He sees the biggest picture, because He knows every piece of our past and every possible outcome in the future. Even though “because I said so” may not spurn our hearts into action, our Lifegiver is more patient than we could ever imagine. He does not quit on us. He is our biggest cheerleader and greatest advocate. He does not give up on drawing us near to Him. His forgiveness is deeper and wider than we know. He does not give us direction then leave us to go it alone. Even in our wanderings, God is with us and provides. May we grow to have confidence and peace in our Father’s instructions, and trust Him enough to obey every time. Grateful for the patience He pours out on us. I have so much to learn as a mother and child.